Thursday, December 16, 2021

Grey's Anatomy DOA

Watching season 18 of GA has been painful, to say the least.  The writing staff seems to have lost their reasoning and sense of direction or purpose.  Season seventeen was painful, but understandable as the show was making the effort to show how Covid was affecting the nation, the hospital, and relationships. All in all, they did a fine job.

Enters season eighteen. It has been painful from the beginning. We viewers all hoped, now that the corvid writing had ended, our favorite characters would appear once more and the show would go on.  Instead, we have a tired Merideth, a shaky Amelia, and a missing Maggy.  I personally am okay Maggy is m-i-a, she has never been a favorite for me. I am struggling to try to figure out why Nick Marsh was brought back.  The most sensible match for Merideth is Dr. Cormac Hayes, played by Richard Flood. The previews for this week's show, however, suggest we may be losing both him and Dr.Owen Hunt.

Amelia has struggled with addiction since she first steps foot on Greys.  As a retired addictions counselor my view of the writing for this character needed to be researched a little more.  They keep saying she has recovered, however that isn't what has happened.  Amelia is simply a "not using". It is concerning for this writer, as recovery is much more than not using substances, it's about how the person faces their life on a daily basis. Just about the time, we think she is on the road to recovery the writing shows us she isn't. Recovery is also about taking back responsibility for that my life, and feeling good about it. Amelia's character has never truly recovered. She lives in fear every day and shares that fear with everyone.  True recovery brings confidence back to the addict. This doesn't mean the person gets cocky or arrogant, but rather the person feels capable of making daily decisions for themselves, learning to trust themselves again. She has never reached this point. She questions everything she does or says, as well as those around her.  She doesn't trust anyone really and most importantly she doesn't trust herself.

Addison, our double board-certified, confident and beautiful Addy, it was so great to hear she was making an appearance, but the actual arrival left us wondering, what was the point.  Addison's character is a great part, too bad the current writers forgot that. She and Merideth seemingly made a truce with their past, but it was so trivial we almost missed it. I was hoping Addy would have a bigger part in this season and maybe return to Grey-Sloan in a meaningful manner.  No such luck apparently.

As for Dr. Baily, besides the fact I haven't been a fan since a few episodes before they made her chief, she doesn't feel part of what is going on now.  She is still fighting to show who is boss and losing. The false relationship the writers keep tossing out there between her and Merideth is painful. She made it clear years ago she didn't like Merideth, she's been jealous of Mer since the beginning and I've seen nothing through the years that convinces me she has changed her mind.

So in conclusion, for this viewer, it is time to call it. Stop all efforts to resuscitate, the patient coded.

#Grey's Anatomy #hemoraging #time of death

Friday, October 29, 2021


We often think of this word with regard to searching for healing.  I try to practice reflection every day.  While looking at myself I try to strive to be the best me I can be. I have learned when I journal, I am able to put on paper what I can’t express otherwise.  At times I save the writing and others are ripped up and tossed. The exercise of putting thoughts down in black and white, and discarding brings clarification and relief for me.

This week my social media feed has had several postings from those in obvious pain.  I say obvious as the words they use, and the message posted clearly indicates they are hurting.  One of the best lessons in my twenty-plus years as an addiction counselor, a batterer’s invention specialist, and providing services for victims of domestic violence, there is a common theme “Hurt People; Hurt People”.  When our own pain becomes too much to face, too overpowering, to deal with, we do and say things we don’t mean. We lash out, we point fingers, we become defensive, and we hurt the very people we love the most. Unfortunately, while in our own pain, we no longer have the perspective of reality.  We shut down, we no longer hear others therefore we can not hear their message of care or reason.  I have long found when I write, the message is found by the people who need it most, including myself.

As the AA Big Book points out; Acceptance is the answer to “ALL” of my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation- some fact of my life unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept my life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes. Alcohol can be substituted with almost any extreme action. We become “addicted” to many things and use them as crutches to navigate life. Truth is the only answer.

My truth, my affirmation for today:

I sit in my silence, I breathe in and breath out, I close my eyes and relax to listen to that voice that is always inside of me beseeching me to listen, not speak, listen, not let random thought confuse me or overpower me. In the silence, the truth can be found. In the silence, I become more open to reality and to acceptance. I wish all acceptance and peace...


Friday, March 5, 2021



I am not them or they, I am me

Standing two feet on the ground

Simply wanting to be free

Free to walk down the street without fear

Free to say what I want loud and clear

Free to do what I please

Even taking a knee

Free to be the person I was born to be

No matter how I look on the outside

My true Spirit lives on the inside

I am not a he or a she I am me

You can’t keep me down

For I will stand my ground

I will unit in the streets

I will speak what I speak

My brothers and sisters will unit with me

For you see we are not He or She

We are all born just to be 

I  AM ME...