Many events are planned and held in October around domestic violence. We attempt to educate the public, find more answers for ourselves when working with victims and abusive people. How do we help put an end to domestic violence? While we have made progress, we are still on a long road to the eradication of violence in our homes. We must first understand the mean of the words
Domestic Violence, even the words don't go together. The dictionary defines to domesticate:
(of an animal) tame and kept as a pet or on a farm: domesticated dogs;
(of a plant) cultivate for food, naturalized, domesticated crops; and the third listed is noted as (humorous - especially of a man) fond of home life and housework, he is thoroughly domesticated.
If this is this is the way we look at this one word how do we begin to change the actions wrapped around, in and through lives where domestic violence exists? This definition fits with the long and deeply held belief that a woman's place is at home. I remember being a young girl playing house thinking about when I would one day be a woman and have my own husband, home and family. How wonderful it was all going to be. My parents had a good marriage, and they were kind caring people. Imagine my shock when I found out not all marriages were like that. From this experience I would later in life work to end domestic violence, by assisting victims and working with abusive people to change their thinking and thereby change their behavior.
When we see violence it imprints our brain this is becoming evermore understanding as brain mapping and study of homes where there is violence are observed. The stories shared by people who experience domestic violence can be found anywhere, any time of day or night in every sociological setting. Domestic violence know no boundaries in race, creed, religion, color, sexual orientation or economic standing. I invite you to learn about domestic violence, what it is and isn't. How to identify it, what to do if experiencing it for yourself or someone you know. There are many programs in each state that provide services for both victim and abuser. In Indiana, Nonviolent Alternatives provides program designed to identify abusive behavior and correct it so people may live happier more fulfilling lives. Many programs across the state provide victim assistance, I suggest Indiana Coalition Against Domestic Violence if you are seeking victim assistance.
As we study more and learn more it has been found the brain of children witnessing violence become "marked" with affects of the violence they hear and see. Learning how our brain is effected with help us to deal with the problems of children living in homes where domestic violence is happening Brain changes due to domestic violence. How do we stop domestic violence, by protecting our children from it and providing them with loving caring homes. Domestic violence is a cyclical problem among families whose lives are surrounded and interwoven with domestic violence.
Changing these patterns requires we begin to address the way our society looks at violence in general, how women are treated and mistreated, accepting there is a rape culture alive and mingled in our neighborhoods, our system of education and still in many professions.
Be a part of the change. Don't standby and without speaking up. The future of our children depend on you getting involved, being a leader, a better informed parent and living as an example of a violent free lifestyle.
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